Anxiety Attack

Today I have had a day of anxiety attacks off and on.

It is Monday today and I am in the middle of a 4-6 week training program of my new staff that I have had to create, develop and rollout without assistance from any part of the business. Plus my Manager is coming down from Sydney tomorrow and I have a 3 hour meeting with him, that I am slightly nervous about.

Work feels rocky at the moment with a lot of going on, a lot of focus on me and my team with minimal support from my interstate Manager. So I am feeling really out in the cold and without a life jacket – I am just trying to keep afloat, meet my business targets and keep my team focused, happy and bringing in revenue. I am supporting them all as much as I can, however without any ‘go to’ person witihin my office or state so no one to bounce ideas, issues or frustrations off.

AND.

The Boy still hasn’t found out about Abu Dhabi – his work has only JUST asked if he is interested and at what package …. so we are still a few days (if any) away from making a life changing decision. Which is stressing me.

I know it shouldn’t but it does – I want to know NOW.

Having spoken to Kiitty Kat (AA buddy) this afternoon, we agreed that I should be trying to live in the now and try not to worry about the future as I cannot control it.

I can only control myself … and even that is questionable at times.

So I am trying to focus on now, rather than ‘what if’.

Doing a lot of ‘shifting it out of my focus’ and begging for assistance to get rid of that horrible anxious, butterfly, sick feeling that I usually drink on – at least I used to know what a drink felt like and how I would feel like afterwards.

Will just focus on getting through today, then tomorow and let the rest worry about itself.

Well that’s the plan.