Today I have had a day of anxiety attacks off and on.
It is Monday today and I am in the middle of a 4-6 week training program of my new staff that I have had to create, develop and rollout without assistance from any part of the business. Plus my Manager is coming down from Sydney tomorrow and I have a 3 hour meeting with him, that I am slightly nervous about.
Work feels rocky at the moment with a lot of going on, a lot of focus on me and my team with minimal support from my interstate Manager. So I am feeling really out in the cold and without a life jacket – I am just trying to keep afloat, meet my business targets and keep my team focused, happy and bringing in revenue. I am supporting them all as much as I can, however without any ‘go to’ person witihin my office or state so no one to bounce ideas, issues or frustrations off.
The Boy still hasn’t found out about Abu Dhabi – his work has only JUST asked if he is interested and at what package …. so we are still a few days (if any) away from making a life changing decision. Which is stressing me.
I know it shouldn’t but it does – I want to know NOW.
Having spoken to Kiitty Kat (AA buddy) this afternoon, we agreed that I should be trying to live in the now and try not to worry about the future as I cannot control it.
I can only control myself … and even that is questionable at times.
So I am trying to focus on now, rather than ‘what if’.
Doing a lot of ‘shifting it out of my focus’ and begging for assistance to get rid of that horrible anxious, butterfly, sick feeling that I usually drink on – at least I used to know what a drink felt like and how I would feel like afterwards.
Will just focus on getting through today, then tomorow and let the rest worry about itself.
Well that’s the plan.